Rants Log-in | Search Rants | Account Info

A CONVERSATION AT THE CHENEY HOUSEHOLD

LYNNE: Uh, Dick…
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: …y’ know that genealogy thing I’ve been running on you?
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: Well, it’s taken a pretty interesting twist.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: I’ve gotten back as far as the early sixteen hundreds, in New England…
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: …and’ve come across the union of two families that links you with another well-known politician.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNE: Dick,…
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: …there is a saving grace, though.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: It was before 1619.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: Y’ know the significance of that?
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: That’s when the first African slaves arrived at the North Carolina colony.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: Here’s the kicker, Dick.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: That family union makes you Barak Obama’s cousin, eight times removed.
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: Even with the saving grace…
DICK: Yeah?
LYNNE: …lucky you’re not running again.
DICK: Yeah!

ADDENDUM

The very first African slaves in present-day United States landed in 1526, with San Miguel de Gualdape, somewhere around Winyah Bay, in what is now South Carolina. The short-lived Spanish colony early-on developed leadership disputes, in which confusion the slaves escaped and took refuge with the Indians. Shortly thereafter, the colony was decimated by disease. The survivors abandoned the settlement and the Africans.